We should focus on positivity, be thankful for what we have, and keep moving forward, but sometimes life is just tough; it’s not always that easy.
A Challenging Week
There have been a lot of things going on in the last few weeks. I’m traveling for work which is always difficult with kids at home. I’ve been leading progress on an Android version to our popular app while coding an exciting update to it <link: How about a Little Competition?>, shooting a slew of videos, and putting out over five written items (emails, blog posts, scripts, and more) a week.
Trying to fit everything in, particularly with a deadline where I have to shoot 6 different adventures in 4 days, seems overwhelming. Doing it when sales have been less than expected and depression seems to always have something to say really makes it more so, even to the point it’s hard to write these words.
Sometimes life is just tough. Sometimes no level of positive thinking, thankfulness, hope for the day calendar mind setting will change that. Unfortunately, that’s the first thing people go to.
A Less Than Encouraging Encouragement
In responding to a text from my sisters about how things were I said they were tough and I got two immediate phone calls that I didn’t answer. It took me many years to realize that if you’re not built like this, you don’t understand. The common way people seem to want to deal with something like this is ignoring it. The second way is to fix it.
The need to fix is strong… so strong in fact it typically unwittingly overpowers the desire to help. I knew if I answered the phone, no matter how well-meaning, it wouldn’t be something that would help me feel hope, but it would be something that would badger me to solve, fix, and correct. Having lived this life for decades, I will be the first to tell you, if there was a fix, I would have used it.
Sometimes life is just tough. It’s not that people can’t help. It’s often that they don’t know how. Sadly, it doesn’t matter how much you tell them, it doesn’t change, but I guess that’s only fair – no matter how much people tell me how to fix it, I can’t either.
An Unsolved Riddle
So how do you make life bearable when it’s not? I wish I knew. I wish I had the answers. I can tell you what I do: believe in a better tomorrow. Keep moving forward. Keep being grateful. Keep believing in where you’re going.
I wish I had more. Sometimes life is just tough. If you have people you can rely on, hold on to them and never let them go. If you have social groups you can cling to, interact with them and stay connected with them.
And if you have both of those, reach out to others who don’t. Provide a little sunshine in someone else’s rain. Do more than just tell them to smile and be happy. Sit with them in sadness. Provide some refuge from life’s storms. Be a source of positivity and hope – not by doing anything – simply by showing them they are worth enough for you to spend your time with . If they are anything like me and the millions like me, you simply need to be present. The best way I can explain it is in the story in my book.
If there’s one thing that’s broken about our positivity culture it’s not that we should try to focus on the good, but that we end up alienating those who are stuck in darkness because we don’t want them to affect our light. If you’re light isn’t strong enough to share a little, then you need to ask yourself how real it is.
Sometimes life is just tough. Keep moving forward. Find people you can rely on. Find motivation where you can. You matter.