What if you had to date Dwayne Johnson? How challenging would that be?
A Point of Clarification
Have you ever wondered what it would be like if you had to date Dwayne Johnson?
Now I’m not talking to the straight men or lesbians out there. Feel free to change the person to Scarlett Johansen or anyone who you find interesting and captivating.
The point of this exercise is not who you are thinking of, but what you are thinking.
Lock It Down
Do you have someone in mind? Good. Then here’s what I want you to think about: what kind of restrictions would that person have to put on you in order to make sure you showed up to the date? I’m not talking about anxiety or fear of chickening out. Imagine those are off the table. I’m simply talking about making sure you don’t become a no show.
Really think this through. If you had to date Dwayne Johnson or someone who you really found fascinating and were excited to spend time with, to what level would that person have to go in order to make sure you showed up?
Would they need to bribe you with money or perhaps track you with surveillance? Perhaps they would need to send a car for you and have someone come to your door to make sure you hopped in. Maybe they would have to put you under house arrest to keep tabs on you until they took you to the date.
If you had to date Dwayne Johnson or Scarlett Johansson or whoever, what would they have to do to make sure you showed up?
A Strange View of Relationships
If you’re wondering why in the world they would have to do anything, I agree with you. If you’re thinking that their mere presence would be all that would be needed for you to join them, I hear you.
So let me ask you this question: what does commitment mean to you?
Because it seems to me a lot of people view commitment as a way of “locking people down”.
They think commitment means that they have now secured a relationship with someone and that other person is now required to be faithful to them. For them commitment puts everyone on notice: this person is unavailable. Once they’ve reached this point, they’re done.
What if commitment is something entirely different?
Not Letting Yourself Go
A lot of people like the idea of a committed relationship because they can “let themselves go”. They stop trying. They worked so hard to get a relationship and now the feel like they reached the goal, locked it down, and can now take it easy.
But what if that’s not commitment? What if that’s the opposite of commitment? What if commitment is more like if you had a date with Dwayne Johnson?
Dwayne Johnson and Scarlet Johansson don’t have to send security detail to force someone to date them. People are drawn to them. People find them interesting and fascinating. They have worked hard to get to where they are, and they continue to improve themselves.
What if commitment isn’t about forcing another person to stay, but about being committed to making them never want to leave? What if “letting yourself go” means letting go of the person who really needs to be in the relationship – the person who is always working to improve and be interesting and captivating and a blast to be around?
What if commitment means you are committed to being the best you for your sake and that in itself makes your partner love to be around you?
A Date with You
What would it take for you to be Dwayne Johnson or Scarlet Johansson: the person that people find enchanting and captivating? You don’t have to be famous or extremely fit or enchanting.
What you do need to be is committed: committed to trying. Committed to bringing something of value. Committed to doing your part. After all, commitment isn’t about making someone stick around while we stop trying. It’s about pledging to bring something of value to the relationship that makes it meaningful.
What can you bring to the table? How can you make your relationships better? It’s not about being Dwayne Johnson. It’s about being the best version of yourself and being committed to adding something worthwhile to your relationships.
That’s when people will start asking what it would be like to have a date with you.
